Feb 19,2014 He’s in the states!
11 months down and only 1 week to go!!!!!!!
My head is filled with sooooo many emotions!!!
Happy, excited, impatient, anxious, hopeful, reminiscent…. I
can’t eat, I can’t sleep, I can’t focus on anything except what it’s going to
be like to have him home… FINALLY!!!!!!
What will I say, What will I do, will I kiss good, will he
think I look just as beautiful as when he left, what will he be like, am I
going to cry?! What will it be like????!!!!
I went from being 20 to a 5 year old within the hour of
hearing he was back in the states…. For 11 months I have been waiting, counting
down, & planning in my head how my reunion with him would be and it’s FINALLY ALMOST
HERE!!!!!!!! It’s been tough and long,
but honestly I am so thankful that God chose me to go through this journey with
Ryan and allowed us to stay together. He has blessed us with such a beautiful
relationship and I can honestly say that Christ has been the absolute center of
it. By the grace of God we are together now and closer than we ever could’ve
been by flesh alone. It was definitely a blessing in disguise. God has blessed me with such a loyal,
wonderful godly man and he is definitely more than worth the wait!!!!!
February 21,2014
12ish pm Homecoming!
My hands were shaking and my chest was broke out in red
splotches(like it always does when I have anxiety or am nervous), I was holding
my welcome home sign, that I spend late hours at night making, that quoted our
song : Waiting For Superman, “Talking to angels, counting the stars-waiting 4
my superman.” If you know Ryan, that
song was perfect for us because he is OBSESSED with superman.:)
Me nor Ryan’s mom got to sit at the gate he was getting off
at like everyone else because, the flight attendees said there were too many
families up there and we would all have to wait in the baggage claim unless
only 2 of us wanted to go by ourselves. It didn’t seem fair to the rest of the
family and friends ,who came to see him as well, to be left behind . We decided to stay and endure
the longer anticipation so we could all embrace the moment together.
We lined up. Family in front& friends in the back. I
chose to be the very last person in line because I wanted to embrace
everything, and secretly wanted the longer hug and kiss.;)
As I stood there waiting ever so patiently and praying, I
had a gentleman holding a camera tap me on the arm, “excuse me ma’am, I was
listening to you and a lady talk about how y’all were needing pictures of your
soldier’s coming home? I was supposed to
do another couple’s pictures, but she got to go up and wait at the gate and I
wasn’t allowed up there, so I’m down here with no one to photograph. Would you
like me to take them?- They’re free!” I
almost cried out of so much joy built up inside than I knew what to do with.
Here was going to be one of the best days of my life, a blessing from God, and
ANOTHER blessing with this photographer! Coincidence?No, I know it absolutely
was an intentional gift from God! As we took some snap shots before seeing
Ryan, I heard cheers from upstairs-My heart is pounding at this point! I see
soldiers coming down the escalator with crying family and girlfriends clinging
to their arms. Ok, now it’s my turn-Where is MY Ryan?!?!?! Soldier after soldier after soldier….THEN ….I
SEE HIM!!!! Goodness, that escalator was SO slow! First the embrace in hugging
his mom, then his brother, his dad, and- wait…. he’s coming towards me? But I’m
not next in line! Ryan skips everyone else and comes to ME!!! As he comes closer I see those big brown eyes
with tears rolling down his face. His faded haircut, his pink cheeks(they flush
when he gets mad, or upset…this was a rare moment of when they were flushed
because he was emotionally happy) ,
those pearly whites in the smile that reached his eyes. Hugging me so tight
with his arms around my waist, the tears started to flow! He smelled like a
brand spakin’ new army uniform! We looked into each other’s eyes and had our
first kiss in 11 months. “we did it”, I whispered in his ear,” we made it” J After that was a blur,
I was on cloud 9. On the way home, all I remember is thanking God for
EVERYTHING and clinging to Ryan’s arm ever so tightly as I laid on his shoulder
on the way home.
11 months of heartache, crying, keeping busy, always waiting
on the call, obsessing over care packages, skype dates, praying, and anticipation. It was
worth it…why? Because God promised me that everything would be ok. Ryan and I
dated for 3 months before he deployed, I didn’t want to be a military
girlfriend, I didn’t want to go through a deployment. But as I prayed day in
and day out, God revealed to me that Ryan was the man He had for me at that time.
I was fearful for my future but lovingly I obeyed. We not only survived during
a deployment, but by the grace of God we grew closer together and to Christ. We
did a weekly bible study over the phone. Tried our best to pray together every
night( we were fortunate, most deployments don’t allow you to talk but a few
times a month-if that. God knew what He was doing and we were & are so
blessed), We encouraged each other to
take up our cross everyday.
“ If it wasn’t for
God’s mercy and His grace, there’s no way we would be standing in this place,
and because He has been faithful every step along the way, here we
are…Together.” And now ,that’s our new song, Together by: Steven Curtis Chapman. God is
good ALL the time, and ALL the time God is GOOD!
My advice to you, the girl in waiting:
For the ladies going through a deployment right now, waiting
on your loved one you either have or will have days where you ask yourself “is
this going to be worth all the tears and all of this heartache?” . The answer
is “Yes”! And no matter how much you
plan in your head how his homecoming is going to be it’s more than likely not
going to be like you planned but it will still be one of the best days you wll
ever experience in your life. One thing
I was really nervous about was if I remembered how to kiss…. Rest assured it
all comes back as soon as you see him! J
When my soldier was back for only two months and it felt
like he never left…. “we went through a 11 month deployment?!” yep!
And we are more in love than we were when he left!!! Stay strong, and
pray on!!!!
